Gay or Not - Guide to know if he is gay.
79
I have seen so many types of gay guys. They are usually really good looking, sweet to talk to and leave you almost wishing they were not gay. I love my gays friends to death because they are so cool. They are like my girlfriends minus the drama at least for me.
These types I describe were actually the guys I worked with in college and first meeting would be sufficient for some, for some you need to know the guy before saying if he is.
1. The feminine gay: There is this guy I work with. He puts on heels, has hair clips and looks a little feminine. In such a case, he's more often than not is gay.
2. The calm and quite gay : This guy is gay but you don't know, because he doesn't talk that much. To crack this code, befriend him on Facebook and it might give you a clue. That's how I came to know because this guy rarely talked and only kind of chuckled when in conversations.
3. The overly friendly gay: This guy at the beginning can be easily confused to be a straight guy "who is flirting with me because he's interested" I have had a difficult time with this guy, because only I knew he was gay but in the college meetings he would be overly affectionate and hug me as he is interested in me in front of others. I had to tell him to stop "acting straight" and be himself. He said this was not his first time a girl told him that. How I came to know this one was gay : I DID not! I had a tiny crush on him,[you can read about our encounter here], but this one time he literally skipped while walking and says "darling" as a term of endearment towards all girls. Little clues!!!
4. The I am cool and you can't say: This guy would not show any physical signs of being gay. It took some time to know that he was, and also Facebook helps a lot, to avoid crushing on the guys. He just like like any other guy except he does not want to act like a jock all the time, and he is usually not looking at girls in that way in a group setting.
Hope that helps. But more often than not, you can never exactly say unless he himself tells you. So just ask him, like casually, without sounding like the pope.
vote upvote downshareprintflag
- Useful (4)
- Funny (2)
- Awesome (2)
- Beautiful
- Interesting (5)
CommentsLoading...
I know you can never say someone is, just by looking at him, that is why at the end I said - "But more often than not, you can never exactly say unless he himself tells you. So just ask him, like casually, without sounding like the pope."
Thats what I did I asked my friends If I had a doubt.
Hey Kewlwriter.
I mainly post my thoughts on your hub, just in case someone might want an opinion from someone who is gay.
I would not suggest to anyone that they should ask someone if they are gay, unless of course that person is directly related to you...certainly not a co-worker or even your best friend. Let them tell you on their own.
I once had a co-worker, (friend) ask me if I was gay, and I thought I could trust her to keep a secret, and the next thing I knew, everyone I worked with knew I was gay. The women were all cool with it, but, I couldn't get through the day without guys suddenly asking me if
getting pounded in the rear...hurt or not.
I would just look at them, and say yeah. It hurts like hell, that's why I don't do it. Yet they automatically assume that is what gay guys do. It's actually very surprising to learn how many straight guys want to know the answer to that question, along with other sexual scenes...using the old "I'm not saying I'm gay...but, would you want me if I was?" questions like that.
I say keep your questions to yourself. If he or she trusts you enough with their sexual identity, they will have no problem talking to you about it. Heck I know one guy who went out of his way to tell everyone...hoping maybe he might even get lucky.
I'll just say that when people ask me if I am gay, it makes me very uncompfortable. I mean, why should it matter to them? I never ask them if they are straight, so what is the big deal?
I also noticed you have a couple good gay films in your hub. Latter Days, and Shelter, were both pretty good movies. Brad Rowe is a total hunk!
I can totally understand how gossipy kind of girlfriends ruin your life. I wrote this hub mainly for girls who want to know if a guy she is interested in Gay or not. Since I had such a hard time and ended up liking this gay guy, I said just ask, incase a girl starts liking someone who could be just more feminine or gay [there is a difference there :)]. So I am not sure with what intent this co-worker asked you but I would ask a guy only if I was interested in him but for some reason I had a doubt.
Yes, I do like the movies Latter days and shelter because they show Love as Love and not as something which is different for men-women and men-men relationships. I just like these movies which happen to have a homosexual relationship.
Does it really matter if someone you know is gay? What should matter is if you had intentions of intimacy with someone, you'd then like to know their sexual preference.
As a gay man, I believe in equality, labels are labels and people are people. In conversation you learn more about people than what the 'label' describes.
Hey KewlWriter;
The girl that asked me if I was gay, was married with 3 kids. It just so happens that she saw me looking at this very handsome business man while we worked, and, she commented on how I was looking at him...like I was in love with him or something...how she put it.
I guess my face must have got as red as a tomato, and, she just looked at me, and said you're gay aren't you. I can tell. Then she just weaseled it out of me. And, when I said yes she laughs...and says I knew it!! But, promissed that it would be our little secret.
But, yes, I later had a few girls who came up to me, and said it's too bad that you're gay, because I was hoping you were going to ask me out sometime. And, I was shocked. I also had one who claimed she would spend a night "converting" me.
Now I know why some straight men pretend to be gay, it's a total chick magnet. As those girls rarely ever talked to me, and suddenly I couldn't get them to leave me alone! So, it was a very weird experience. I even had one of my male co-workers ask me if I thought he was hot.
He was very hot. But, he was also only 18, so I kept my mouth shut. I just said, you are a very good looking guy. Someone later told me that he said he was gay too. Of course after he no longer worked there! DARN!!
please tell me why i like boys?
Dear jarge,
No one can tell you why you like boys. But if you do, you have to accept it and accept yourself for being gay. Let me tell you, only you can live your life as you want and let no one else tell you what you are. When you know who you are, and for other people to accept you you have to accept yourself and move one.
Okay, so here's the thing. I am in middle school and I'm gay.I like a jock who I caught a couple of times glancing at me, but he says that he is straight. What should. I do if I really like him??????
Well the same rules apply in any type of attraction. If he says he is straight, he probably is. Many people look at others just to look at their dressing style, their attitudes etc. It's just a human experience of "people watching". I think you should look else where for romance. Sorry kiddo, but you are still young!! :)
True, but I said I was straight until a couple of months ago, so he could just be in the closet still
You have to give him time to do his thing. I am sorry but it's his life. You can't force anyone to come out of the closet, if he wants to he will. If you can't wait for him, then move on. Lot's of fish in the sea.
I guess ur right :/
Don't be disheartened. You are in middle school, you have your whole life ahead of you and I am pretty sure you will break some hearts in your day too ;). You will find your "Mr. Right" someday!!
Thank you so much for the help! And thanks for the advice! You really should do this for a living!
I am new to the site and this may not be the proper thread. If so, I apologize. I struggle with the perception that I am gay, when I am clearly not! What does a guy have to do to prove his heterosexuality? I am married, have children, I even lift weights, yet I am constantly percieved as gay. I don't have a problem with gays, but I am a committed hetero. I don't want to come on too strong against this image and be labeled a closet queen.
@me - glad I could be of help.
@bbitguy - I understand what you are saying. You just don't want to be stereotyped correct? There may be few things that you want to check which could be your blind spots and hence people thinking you are gay.
1. Your walk - Might wanna record yourself walking from front and behind and see if your walk is feminine.
2. Do you have a baby face? consider maintaining facial hair.
3. Mannerisms - talk, head shaking, sitting etc. Again record yourself or talk to a friend who can watch you and tell you where you might be giving off wrong impressions.
Let me know what you found out! Good Luck.
Is it gay if i want to be a female
If you are a man and want to be a female, you are not necessarily gay, but you are transsexual. Many transsexual men are not gay but fancy women, they just want to dress like a woman.
You are gay when you want to have sex with other men. You need to think about yourself. Do you just want to be dressed like a women? Do you want to be a women? Do you want to have sex with men? Delve deeper into your inner self. Hope you can find yourself and all the answers you are looking for.
brimancandy 20 months ago
You left out the hot looking straight stud, whom everyone thinks is nailing a different chick in the company, because someone is spreading rumors that he has just nailed the bosses daughter. If you ask around, a lot of it is nothing more than just rumors, and it doesn't matter if the guy is gay or straight, it's usually made up lies...just like the office whore.
Some very masculine gay men, who want to remain closeted will tell stories on conquest, and hope that it gets around to hide the fact that the only person in the company he has been nailing, is the guy who drives the delivery truck, and usually in the back of it.
Come on, to be able to tell who is and who isn't gay is way more complicated then appearance and mannerisms. I know plenty of very masculine hot guys, who act like any normal straight guy, who are some of the biggest gay sex pigs on the planet. I know, because I have had sex with them. And, even some of those encounters were a shock.
You can't tell who is gay. If you could, nobody would ever have to struggle to come out to their parents, or worry that someone at work migh discover their secret.
The only way you are going to know if someone is truly gay, is if they go around telling everyone about it.
There are several guys that I used to know, whom I learned were gay. Some, I wish I had known about, because I would have liked to date them. And, some that just surprised the crap out of me.
You really want to try to figure it out, try figuring out which one of your lady friends or aquaintences are a lesbian. That's a mystery all by itself.